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Checklist of the Parasites of Fishes of Latvia

Not really about Latvian fishes

The lusty maiden of the shire

An especial for the Daily Tyckler, by John the Scribe

Not much does happyn yn this most lonesome of shires, but yn my possession are certain articles that may constern and mortify the young Miss Frump, just out of her first menses, and who happyns to be the daughter of the powerful Lord Wolthard Frump, executor of the shire manse and owner of all peasants and freemen wythyn his vast holdings. Miss Frump is renowned as quite the Venusian beacon and daily breaks the hearts of the common gents who deign to approach her inviting countenance. Lord Frump is constantly on alert to beat away these wayward and lascivious beasts. Till now, her lyfe has been one of taciturnity, but I, John the Scribe, have uncover’d tidings that wyll shed light upon the Shiress Frump…

*Medical records that reveal Miss Frump fainting after an encounter with a ploughman!

*A doctor’s note encouraging Miss Frump to eat less acorn-bread and barnacles, as a fissure had appear’d on her sphynctre!

*Miss Frump’s quinny, an etching of unknown authorship!

*All records of Miss Frump’s financial transactions whych include a visit to the local undergarment broker!

*Soiled nightcaps and cotton serviettes that may have graced Miss Frump’s apertures!

*These items and many more besides!

To marvel at these commodities, come by my grass hut after sundown. Price is 5 guineas or the equivalent in chycken feed. Ask for John or Roger the Fuller.

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